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THE PROPHET SPEAKETH
College Football's Place for Foolishness on the Internet
© 2004 P. Chamlis/The Prophet Speaketh, All Rights Reserved
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Another pothole on the information superhighway,
conveniently located at
http://workmanpoll.cnchost.com/prophet
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/theprophetspeaks

THE PROPHET'S RECORD FOR THE 2004 SEASON
GAMES FORECAST 79
GAMES CORRECT 61
PCT CORRECT 77.2%

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Hi Propheteers, welcome to another crazy week of college football. I
didn't have a great record last Saturday, but I did manage to keep my
overall percentage at a healthy 77% plus. I, like many of you,
attended a college game and had a terrific time. Great weather,
color, pageantry and hanging out with your best friends. It doesn't
get any better does it? Well, one thing that WOULD be better is to
get a few more games picked correctly, here on The Prophet Speaks.
Are you ready to see me try? Then as Buddy Holly would say, "well,
all right...."

Thursday, September 23
Miami at Houston
I note that this Thursday night ESPN massacre is being played at
Reliant Stadium, the home of the NFL Houston Texans. I believe it
might be a great idea to let the pros slide in as ringers on the side
of the local Cougars. The gambling gambinos would love it all. Oh
sure, the Hurricanes would still come out on top. But perhaps the
Texans, working in cahoots with the University of Houston, could
cover the spread. And from ESPN's standpoint, anything that keeps a
game competitive until the 4th quarter is a good investment.
Hurricanes by 17.

Friday, September 24
BYU at Boise State
A lot of folks are calling BYU schizophrenic, indicating that you
never know which Cougar club may show up for a particular game. But
I disagree with this multiple personality notion. BYU is simply a
slightly-above-average football team that got "kind-of" lucky on
opening night. For the most part, lining up against better teams has
resulted in a pretty consistent and compelling loss for BYU. This
Friday's game offers an especially great danger to the Provo posse,
as they travel to Idaho to ride in a Bronco roundup. BSU is the most
dangerous kind of good team, namely a good team that somehow keeps
slipping under everyone's radar. By the time Cougar radar gets a
good fix on Boise State, I think it's gonna be too late. Broncos by
10.

Saturday, September 25
Syracuse at Virginia
College football fans have been mightily impressed with how well
Virginia has played in this new season. And conversely, folks have
been shocked to see how sorry Syracuse has become over the last
couple of years. Look for Saturday to bring more of the same, with
scads of people being impressed by the Wahoos and even more fans
holding their nose while watching Syracuse. Cavaliers by 16.

N.C. State at Virginia Tech
VaTech and NC State have something in common this year. Both teams
have lost close contests when playing recent defending national
champs. Unfortunately for Chuck Amato's Wolfpack, the ACC-newby
Hokies also have figured out how to bounce back from such a loss.
Drilling State for conference win number two, call it Virginia Tech
by 14.

Vanderbilt at Navy
Nautically speaking, one would expect a bunch of Commodores to be
able to handle themselves when visiting the Naval Academy. However,
I expect that the Annapolis Middies have plans to mutiny on Saturday,
putting a bounty on a win over visiting Vanderbilt. Navy by 3.

Air Force at Utah
When Urban Meyer's Utah "Air Force" catches sight of the Air Force
Academy's pass defense, they're gonna salivate like fat kids begging
for chocolate chip cookies at the Doubletree. Look for the Utes to
sink their teeth into the Falcon secondary on Saturday, UU by 21.

Mississippi at Wyoming
On paper, I figure Ole Miss to be a better football team than
Wyoming. But as we all know, games are played on the field, not on
paper. The Rebs are just not a very good road team, and this contest
comes down in the faraway Rocky Mountain home of Wyoming. Therefore,
based on the distance being travelled, I'll pull out an upset in this
intersectional clash, call it Cowboys by 2. And FWIW, Ole Miss ain't
THAT good at home, either. :)

Iowa at Michigan
It hasn't been the best two weeks for "Blue". First, there was that
totally-unexpected unpleasantness down in South Bend two weeks ago.
Following up that debacle, the mighty Wolverines, formerly considered
an outside contender for a national championship, had to use overtime
to finally escape San Diego State...in the "Big House", no less.
Speaking of overtime, I'll bet that this year's edition of Maize and
Blue fans are running low on patience. A second loss of the season,
coming at home and in-conference, would seem unthinkable. However,
the faithful should actually put some thought into the possibility of
starting the year 1-2. Thought yes, but concrete plans, maybe not.
Finding a way to win the Big Ten home opener, I'll call it Michigan
by 3.

Purdue at Illinois
I'm assuming that Purdue QB Kyle Orcutt has designs on an NFL career
for his future. However, after the surgery he'll perform on the
Illini secondary this Saturday, medical school could be a fall-back
plan worth consideration. My advice to the Illini is to review and
reconcile their Blue Cross coverage sometime well before kickoff.
Purdue by 24.

Michigan State at Indiana
Has there been a bigger Big Ten disappointment in 2004 than the
Spartans of John L. Williams? Perhaps big John should have skipped
his summer trip to Mount Kilimanjaro in favor of a directional
coaching retreat. And as bad as things are up in East Lansing, the
complete opposite is true in Bloomington. The Hoosier season is
already a smashing success, as IU has actually won a game. As far as
Gerry DiNardo and company are concerned, "Great Expectations" is only
a book at the campus library. Speaking of reading, look for John L
to read his Spartans enough of a riot act to motivate them to a close
road win this Saturday. Not pretty at all, but perhaps effective
enough to salve Spartan wounds, Michigan State by 6.

Washington at Notre Dame
Coach Ty Willingham has seemingly righted the direction of this
year's Fighting Irish. Last Saturday, they closed out their conquest
of the state of Michigan in successive weekends. Coach Up and Down
seems to have things blowing his way right now, but he might want to
consider the consequences. Winning a few more games is going to
convince some of the Domer faithful that wins over USC and Tennessee
are clearly on the horizon. Now, we knowledgeable and non-ND alumni
fans clearly know better. But on this Saturday, look for Willingham
and company to continue painting themselves into a corner with
another solid home victory. Fighting Irish by 10.

Texas Tech at Kansas
Last weekend, the Tech Raiders scored more points than some teams
score in an entire month. So, that's especially bad news for the
impotent Kansas Jayhawks. Look for another offensive explosion to
occur Saturday, as Tech scores points somewhat faster than Kansas can
answer `em. Texas Tech by 14.

Mississippi State at LSU
Last weekend saw both Mississippi State and LSU losing close football
games, but THERE is where the similarity ends. While the Bayou
Bengals fell by 1 point to a highly regarded Auburn club on the road,
Sylvester Crooms' Bullpuppies lost AT HOME to MAINE. Maine? Now,
not to go regional here, but NO SEC team needs to be losing a
football game to Division 1-AA Maine. Maybe the Black Bears could
hold their own in cross country skiing. But football? Mississippi
State ought to be ashamed of last weekend. Sadly, things are not
going to improve at all for MSU Saturday, as they climb into the ring
with a bloodied and angry bunch of defending SEC champions. This
one'll be ugly. LSU by 24.

Kentucky at Florida
After seeing UF do everything EXCEPT defeat mighty Tennessee last
weekend, one would assume that Kentucky will prove little challenge
for Ron Zook's lizards. But as we all know, rappin' Ronnie's road
record is much stronger than the home slate. His teams have saved
some of their worse disappointments for Ben Hill Griffith Stadium.
Saturday afternoon could offer another opportunity to build on that
Zook mystique. However, I don't believe any skullduggery will occur
courtesy of the UK Wildcats. Kentucky just don't have the scratch to
get it done down in G'ville. Florida by 14.

Boston College at Wake Forest
A lot of folks were very impressed with Wake Forest's opening-day
performance. Although the Deacs ended up losing to Clemson, they DID
demonstrate a dominating line and rushing game. However, the next
couple of weeks have placed the season more clearly in focus. What
looked like a quality loss at first now clearly labels Wake Forest as
THE only team to have lost to Tommy Bowden and company so far in
2004. One IS the loneliest number, and look for the Deacs to remain
lonely on Saturday as their future conference opponents from Boston
College fly into town. Getting an early sniff of success in the ACC,
call this one Eagles by 13.

The Citadel at Auburn
Folks in Tigerland would have been ecstatic if you'd told them 2004
would include wins over LSU and the Bulldogs. But that is exactly
what's about to happen, in consecutive weekends no less.
Unfortunately, these "Bulldogs" are not the pups from Athens,
Georgia, but rather a bunch of short-hairs from up at the Citadel.
Look for Tommy Tuberville's Tigers to run a little boot camp of their
own on Saturday, as they kick the Citadel clean out of Jordan-Hare
Stadium. Auburn by 35.

Louisiana Tech at Tennessee
Jeez Louise. Last weekend, LaTech lines up against the wicked Miami
Hurricanes. And on this Saturday, they hit to road up to Knoxville,
Tennessee, to play Phil Fulmer's UT Volunteers. It might be time to
put the entire Bulldog gridiron squad on 24-hour suicide watch.
Absorbing a second solid beating within a week, look for LaTech to
get spanked at Neyland Stadium. Tennessee by 28.

Memphis at UAB
Last weekend, the UAB Blazers let one of Florida State's backs (Leon
Washington) run for over 100 yards. Now, not discounting Mr.
Washington's talent, I still think it suffices to say that anyone
allowing the presently-coached Seminole offense to gain ANY
SIGNIFICANT yardage via the ground game has issues. And the worst
issue in the Steel City on Saturday would be one DeAngelo Williams.
Mr. Williams is quite simply one of the best backs in the country.
Look for it to be a long evening at Legion Field. Memphis by 21.

Washington State at Arizona
The Wildcats have come close, but have yet to taste any winning
success in 2004. However, this weekend looks to be the time and
place that the Mike Stoopes hire starts to pay dividends. Look for
this to be the first of many career wins for Mike, as well as the
first opportunity for the other members of the Pac Ten to start
hating anything associated with the surname Stoopes. Arizona by 7.

Alabama at Arkansas
A promising Alabama season got some bad news last Saturday, as
starting QB Brodie Croyle went down for the year. Now admittedly,
the Tide didn't have a lot of offense to start with. But, losing
your signal-caller before a big SEC road contest is never to be
considered lucky. Speaking of callers, the crowd at Arkansas will,
as usual, show up loaded and calling sooooey pig until their throats
close up. So, whichever unfortunate Alabama backup QB inherits first
team duty is going to be in for a rough night on the road. Home
piggies by 7.

Penn State at Wisconsin
Barry's Badgers return to Madison as a very beat-up football club.
And speaking of beat up, here comes crusty old Joe Paterno. Now,
some would say that old and beat-up are mutually-inclusive terms.
There's no denying that in the last couple of years, JoPa's gotten
beat up more than his share of times. Maybe the old man is ready to
dish it out a bit. No time like the present I'd say, with Wisconsin
still licking their many wounds. Kicking `em while they're down,
call this one a Penn State upset win. Nittany Lions by 3.

Clemson at Florida State
Tommy Bowden, the up and down coach of the Clemson Tigers, should
feel right at home on the road in Tallahassee this Saturday. Back
home in South Carolina, the glow of late 2003 has totally gone dark
with back-to-back upset losses. Once again, folks are screaming for
a Bowden pelt. Similarly down in Tallahassee, the same is true, as
Tommy's younger brother Jeff is only slightly more popular locally
than Osama Bin Laden. Now you might think that the loser of this
game is in line for a firin', come season's end, but that's not
actually true. It appears that Daddy Bowden at FSU has no intention
in making a change in his son's employment status, no matter how
wretched and sickly his play-calling and preparation appears to be.
So Jeff Bowden remains unaccountable and untouchable for his
performance, so long as Bobby and/or wife (and mama) Anne Bowden
is/are alive. Unfortunately for the Tiger-coachin' Bowden, mama has
no pull with the Clemson trustees. Can FSU save Tommy's job two
years in a row? It could happen...it really could. But it won't, so
let's call it Seminoles by 12.

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