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THE PROPHET SPEAKETH
Fool's Paradise for Internet College Football Fans

© 2005 P.Chamlis/
The Prophet Speaketh, All Rights Reserved

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Games of November 24 – 26, 2005

I had a pretty decent record last week. So I'll start this week by
giving thanks as I remain 75% accurate for the year. I am now right
on 210 out of 280 picks, which ain't bad, folks.

And, let me just wish each and every one of you a Happy
Thanksgiving. As you sink your teeth into your turkey, ham or even
Caesar Salad (for my vegetarian readers), please know that I am
thankful for my readers' friendship and support. And thanks again
for cutting down on the death threats.

One last thing...this Thursday is a very special day in my family.
My mother will turn 80 years old on Thanksgiving Day. Happy
Birthday, Mom. We all love you!

OK, let's get some more games right...

Thursday/Thanksgiving, November 24

Pittsburgh at West Virginia
This season-ending contest has long been called "The Backyard
Brawl". It's a series that pre-dates both teams' membership in the
Big East Conference. And even though the conference neighborhood is
beginning to look a little run-down, folks both in Pittsburgh and
Morganton still want get the better of their "neighbors". THIS
Thursday Night's post-Thanksgiving dinner shootout is being hosted
by the country cousins in this twisted little relationship, and I
don't expect too many city manners to be in evidence when Rich
Rodriguez's hillbillies take the field. Even though the Big East is
becoming pointless (from a national standpoint), the conference
kingpin still gets invited to some unfortunate BCS bowl. And as
they'd say up in the hills, the Mountaineers "aim" to be playing
football in early 2006. Mountaineers by 10.

Friday, November 25

Texas at Texas A&M
The Texas Aggies, as Texas A&M likes to call themselves, are one of
only two hurdles left in UT's quest for a Rose Bowl berth. Now, I
know what they always say about these "rivalry" games...the
old "anything can happen" song and dance. But even with this
contest kicking off a day past Thanksgiving, I see Mack Brown's Herd
stuffing themselves a bunch of maroon-clad turkeys up in College
Station. We might be getting to the point that the A&M athletic
department re-examines their supposedly good idea about hiring
Dennis Frangione. Longhorns by 16.

Arkansas at LSU
I'll be the first to admit that this will be no cakewalk for LSU.
Sure, the Tigers have EVERYTHING to play for, but the Hogs are
always toughest late in the season. As I try to forget that USC
scored 70 points on the Razorbacks earlier this year, I tell you
with a completely straight face that this one might be really,
really close. Really. But even though Arkansas can and will "hurt"
LSU more than you'd expect in this Friday night fight,
they'll "hurt" the Auburn Tigers even more. Denying the War Eagles
a backdoor invitation to Atlanta and the SEC title game, Arkansas
gets roasted on the road. In a fistfight, let's say LSU by 8.

Arizona at Arizona State
When Arizona blew UCLA's doors off a few weeks ago, some called it
Mike Stoopes' first "signature win" in Tucson. And if you agree
with that representation, let's suggest that Mike bring his ink pen
along on this season-ending trip to Tempe. When the final score is
posted, Mike just might have something else he wants to scrawl his
John Hancock all over. Arizona by 3.

Nebraska at Colorado
We may be a politically divided country, but among football fans,
there's one truth which few can deny. Bill Callahan has just about
ruined the Nebraska football program. And, there just might be a
political solution in sight. You see, former Husker coach and state
demigod Tom Osborne is running for governor of Nebraska. The
election will be held in November of 2006, with inauguration to
occur in early 2007. Now, in perhaps the easiest pick I'll ever
make, Tom will win in a rout that would embarrass USC. And even
though the state of Nebraska may have many pressing needs, few would
gripe if Governor Tom's first official act is to initiate steps to
rid the Huskers of the Callahan pestilence. How long has it been
since you cast a vote that really meant something, Nebraska fans?
Colorado by 10.

Wisconsin at Hawaii
Last week, I heard an interview with Penn State Coach Joe Paterno.
He was wondering aloud as to why Coaches such as "Alvarez, Snyder,
etc." were retiring so young. Joe said "I'm not going anywhere".
I'm sure the Penn State fans are hoping that the future holds more
of 2005's success than the frustration of the previous four or five
campaigns. But let's forget about Joe, this story is really all
about Barry Alvarez. Barry's only 58 years old and he's going out a
hero. Nobody in Madison has said things like "he's too old", "he's
lost touch", etc. Living here in Tallahassee, I can tell you that
it's truly sad when a legendary coach loses it. So, good for you,
Barry. Enjoy just being the athletic director, and knock yourself
out on your trip to Honolulu. And next November when Joe Paterno is
freezing his ass off on some snowy Big Ten sideline, or Bobby Bowden
is trying to explain how his team's fifth conference loss isn't a
coaching issue, smart-guy Barry can open up the last of his
chocolate-covered macadamias, pour himself a brandy and just smile.
Wisconsin by 7.

Saturday, November 26
Maryland at N.C. State
Thanks to Tennessee's collapse over in the SEC, the Atlantic Coast
Conference may well get 8 bowl invitations this year. And who would
have thought, heading into this season, that NC State wouldn't be
among the conference's eight best teams? Well, I can assure you the
Wolfpack athletic brass wouldn't have expected such
underachievement. It's too bad that Chuck Amato can't schedule one
more round with his Bowden buddies from Tallahassee. But for once,
beating FSU isn't going to save an ACC coaching career, or so it
would seem. And like I've said for weeks, don't get between Ralph
Friedgen and the bowl game buffet. Terrapins by 7.

Tennessee at Kentucky
Well, I nailed it last weekend, didn't I? Tennessee losing to
Vanderbilt at home in Knoxville. Has there been a bigger
disappointment this year than the Vols? If Phil Fulmer's not
feeling the heat, he's wearing asbestos undershorts. From a logical
standpoint, this pick seems easy. Kentucky will be fired up,
sensing an opportunity to kick UT when they're down. And
Tennessee? There's more motivation to work at a welfare office than
on the Big Orange bench. So, picking the Wildcats would seem to be
like shooting fish in a barrel. But once in a while, you just have
to go with your feeling, your gut instinct. And here it is,
folks...as sorry as Tennessee has become as a football team, I just
don't see them losing to Vanderbilt and Kentucky on consecutive
weekends. In the past, it might not have happened in consecutive
centuries. Somehow, they'll get it done. Tennessee by 3.

Mississippi at Mississippi State
For some reason, this annual state rivalry game is called the Egg
Bowl. It's been Egg-splained to me several times, and I just can't
seem to remember it. Try as I may, it's not a designation that I
can identify with. But since it's the Egg Bowl, we'll have to stick
with a scrambled motif for the pick. Ole Miss got themselves
whipped into a wimpy meringue last weekend by LSU, continuing a
season that has been far short of sunnyside-up. But over on the
Starkville sideline, Sylvester Crooms and company have mastered that
Humpty-Dumpty story. The MSU season started with a big fall, and
nobody's had much luck putting State back together again. And on
Saturday, all the king's horses and men will gaze out upon another
Bulldog crackup as the Rebs poach a victory on the road. Ole Miss
by 5.

Virginia at Miami
Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus. And so begins one of the
most famous newspaper editorials of all time. As for Santa Claus,
old Kris Kringle's got nothing on the Miami Hurricanes. Last
weekend, UM wrapped up a shot at the ACC title and sent it up to
Virginia Tech. By choking away their game against Georgia Tech, UM
signaled their intent to be satisfied with a second straight non-BCS
bowl trip. This new conference just isn't as much fun as the old
Big East, eh? Now, we can't give Miami all of the credit for
Virginia Tech's resurrection. The Virginia Cavaliers did their part
in sending VaTech to Jacksonville by rolling over at home in
Charlottesville last Saturday. So when the Wahoos and Canes hook up
in the Orange Bowl to end the season, they can compare notes on
who's done the most to further Beamer Ball in 2005. As for picking
this game, let's just put it this way...the game film from this
contest will join the Virginia Tech video in the Cavalier trash
compactor come Monday morning. Hurricanes by 21.

Florida State at Florida
Bobby Bowden is college football's winningest coach. So, when he
began to talk about this contest last week, I paid close attention.
Coach Dadgummit said "he didn't like divisional formats in
conferences because one of these years, some team with four losses
was going to play in the ACC title game". Now at the time, this all
sounded silly because FSU was 7-2 and Virginia Tech was undefeated.
Heck, Miami only had one loss. But by golly, the coach appears to
be onto something. FSU is now 7-3, and thanks to Dadgumit's
insight, as well as his son's fine offensive gameplan, I can
confidently say that the Noles will be 7-4 after their first
encounter with Urban warfare. In the above-mentioned interview, BB
also made some comment about "that four loss team was gonna win the
conference championship and get into a BCS bowl". Now THAT is just
crazy talk, as you'd all agree. Florida by 10.

South Florida at Connecticut
Do you realize that if the South Florida Bulls keep winning, they'll
be in a BCS bowl? And while as a Floridian, that would make me
very, very proud, it can't make the Big East very happy. After
sending a sub-par Pittsburgh team to the Fiesta Bowl last year,
being represented by a no-name squad like USF in 2005 would further
demote the Big East in the eyes of the nation. Mark my words...USF
claiming a BCS bowl this year will hasten the day that the BCS says
adieu to the Big East Conference. Having another at-large team
would be more fun anyway. South Florida by 6.

Oklahoma State at Oklahoma
They call this annual contest by a single word in the state of
Oklahoma. It's "Bedlam". And for this year, the name just doesn't
fit. True "Bedlam" occurred in Norman as OU opened their season by
losing to TCU. And far from being "just an upset", the losses kept
on coming. There was a blowout at UCLA, a rogering by Texas, and
just recently, another loss down in Lubbock. So we might just have
to pardon Bob Stoopes if he's had enough "Bedlam" for one year.
Look for the Sooners to put an end to any further disruptions when
the OSU Cowboys ride into Owen Field. Oklahoma by 3.

North Carolina at Virginia Tech
All they have to do is beat North Carolina and they'll be in the ACC
title game. The homemade gravy on the VaTech season seems simple
enough, but there's still the matter of roasting the UNC goats. In
spite of a dreadful performance against Miami three weeks ago, the
Hokies have gotten a second chance. Beamer Ball is all about making
the most of extra opportunities, so I think things will come out
just fine as VaTech punches both North Carolina AND their ticket to
Jacksonville with a solid Blacksburg victory. Tech by 12.

Notre Dame at Stanford
Normally, I wouldn't have picked this game as it's clearly a
blowout. But Stanford pissed me off royally with their performance
against Cal in last week's "Big Game". What were they running,
anyway, a "Wuss Coast" offense? It's my pleasure to predict their
imminent demise this Saturday as a much better team plows into Palo
Alto. Look for Notre Dame to use this west-coast swing as an
opportunity to show off for the BCS scouts. Fighting Irish by 20.

Georgia at Georgia Tech
It's been pointed out that this game is the first of two straight
trips to Atlanta for Georgia. The SEC title game will be played
over at the Georgia Dome, whereas this contest will occur at
venerable Bobby Dodd stadium. Seeing as how the Yellowjacket rumble
has little effect on what happens later in Georgia's season, one
would conclude that Tech represents a much greater danger than does
LSU or perhaps Auburn next Saturday. But, Chan's clan has already
had their shining moment this year. Last weekend's upset of the
Miami Hurricanes was a thing of beauty, but it was GT's lightening
strike for the year. Before Tech upset Miami, I was all ready to
pull the trigger on an upset pick for this game. But considering
that Bulldog Coach Mark Richt is a Hurricane alum and also spent
years dealing with Miami in his Florida State coaching days, Tech
ain't sneaking up on anybody this weekend. Their win over Miami has
attracted plenty of attention from the Bulldog coaching staff. The
game will be a battle, but the result will be what most would have
expected. No funny business this Saturday, folks. Georgia by 7.


All right, there you have it. Another week of college football. I
hope you all have a great holiday.