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THE PROPHET SPEAKETH
Fool's Paradise for Internet College Football Fans

© 2005 P.Chamlis/
The Prophet Speaketh, All Rights Reserved

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Games of November 10 – 12, 2005


Well, your lovin' Prophet came crashing back to "average" last
Saturday, as many picks went awry. There were certainly good
moments, such as the dead-on nailing of the UNC two point upset of
Boston College, the almost perfect point spread on the Alabama game
AND the South Carolina win over Arkansas on the road. We'll try to
forget the horrible misses involving VaTech, FSU and UCLA. Nice
work, Bruins.

For the year, Prophet is still a respectable 75% accurate, 176 out
of 234. As we hit the home stretch, rivalries make picking winners
even tougher. But, that's not gonna stop me from trying. Let's see
what shakes down for this week:


Thursday, November 10
Boise State at Fresno State
What a difference a year makes. Last year, the BSU Broncos were the
talk of BCS anarchists everywhere. Along with Utah and Louisville,
the boys from the blue field were held up as an example of deserving
teams being ignored by college football's major conference
nobility. Going into 2005, Boise was supposedly going to get their
chance, as they opened against highly-regard Georgia "between the
hedges" in Athens. Well, for any WAC protagonists who've erased the
debacle from their memory banks, the Bulldogs crushed the Broncos,
perhaps making some folks question if BSU was EVER legitimate. The
opening defeat was followed by a season in relative obscurity for
Coach Dan Hawkins and crew. This Thursday night's contest will be
another opportunity for the Idahoans to exhibit their brand of
football for a national audience. How comforting it must be for
Bronco fans to realize that it's another road game against another
bunch of Bulldogs. Look for the same basic result as the last time
BSU tried to walk the doggies. Bulldogs, this time the ones from
FSU-West, by 14.

Friday, November 11
Rutgers at Louisville
November 11th may be Veterans' Day in the USA, but in Canada, it's
called "Remembrance Day". Cardinal Head Coach Bobby Petrino may
well want to steep his boys in "north of the border" ways for this
Big East clash. Rutgers may not be a real "name program" in college
football, but they've played some solid games on a couple of
occasions in 2005. The Scarlet Knights beat Pittsburgh, last week's
Louisville opponent, nearly as badly as did the Cardinals. So,
playing at home on ESPN2, L'ullville had best put a
little "remembrance" into their game plan, as in "remembrance of
what happens when one takes an opponent lightly". But reverting to
the American holiday mode, let's assume that the Cardinal "Veterans"
will play a game worth remembering at good old Papa John's Stadium.
Louisville by 24.

Saturday, November 12
Colorado at Iowa State
There don't appear to be many teams standing between CU and the Big
XII North Division title, so long as they don't stumble over the
likes of Iowa State. So, look for Colorado to stampede in with a
purpose and leave with a hard-fought win on their way to another
date with Texas come December. Buffs by 7. (...and a question to
ponder...exactly how many officials of the Big XII conference,
hungry for Texas to visit and win this year's Rose Bowl, would kill
themselves should Colorado actually WIN, rather than just show up
in, the conference title game? If you'd like to start placing bets,
the over/under on upset-related suicides is 3)

Baylor at Missouri
The Baylor Bears were victims of mistaken identity last weekend.
They basically took someone ELSE's beating. You see, the Texas
Longhorns sent a message to the Virginia Techs, Alabamas and UCLAs
of the world last weekend, using Baylor as their unwilling voodoo
dolls. The resulting announcement was heard loud and clear, from
sea to shining sea, as Baylor was routed 62-0. Up until that
catastrophe, BU had played most of their opponents tight, at least
for a while. Depth usually catches up with the Waco boys in the
fourth quarter, and I suspect that will again be an issue this
Saturday in Columbia. But seeing as how Missouri (a) doesn't have
THAT much depth themselves and (b) Baylor represents only themselves
this weekend, and not for every other BCS title game wannabe, I
think things might be about to go right for Yogi and the other Boo-
Boos. In an upset, Baylor by 2.

Arkansas at Mississippi
Most college kids in the Dixie know a thing or two about slopping
hogs. This is, after all, the south. A lot of southerners bring
home the bacon by raising it. But the University of Mississippi, to
the surprise of many, is a different kind of campus. The joke
around the south is that J. Crew makes 30% of their annual profit
just selling shirts during Rebel home game weekends. Mississippi's
Oxford campus is inhabited by such a bunch of preppies that you'd
swear you were at some Midwestern snotty school that plays Men's
Soccer instead of football. That is, at least, until they open
their mouth. Then, you'll that Magnolia blossom dialect; all them
y'alls and yes'ums. As for sloppin' the hogs on Saturday, that's
work for the hired help around Ole Miss. And seeing as how Rebel
football hasn't had a lot of wins lately, the hired help's "done
gone". Arkansas by 6.

Kansas State at Nebraska
Did you see where Nebraska Coach Bill Callahan got his tail in a
crack for being a fan-taunting wise-guy a couple of weeks ago? It
seems that Billy boy forgot that he was playing in one of the
hallowed halls of college football rather than the ghetto that is
the Oakland Raiders. Bill was annoyed with a fan, or some fans, and
made a "throat-slashing" gesture in said fans' direction.
Classless, totally classless. And, it's not very smart, either.
Seeing as how Nebraska football has gone from bad to worse to
terrible, Bill shouldn't be giving disgruntled Husker fans any ideas
with that "throat-slash" thing. Over on the K-State sideline, wins
haven't come any easier. But at least Bill Snyder continues to
coach with class, if not success. Want proof that life is unfair?
Callahan will come out on top in this battle of "Class Bill"
versus "Ass Bill". Nebraska by 3.

Northwestern at Ohio State
Football purists love a classic struggle. Northwestern is a team
with a great offense, and Ohio State sports a nasty and stingy
defense. The collision of the two in the Columbus Horseshoe could
and should be a thing of beauty. And although not always the case,
GREAT defense usually stymies GREAT offense. You know the old yarn,
defense wins championships. Well, there are no championships on the
line here, but the Buckeye "D" is certain to give Tressel's troops a
leg up on the Windy City Wildcats. On the other side(s) of the
ball, the Ohio State offense is, in reality, pretty average. Ted
Ginn is supposedly a great, great player. (although I've never seen
him do anything of note in any OSU games I've watched...I must jinx
the man) However, if Ted and his teammates are ever going to
explode, Saturday just might be the day. Northwestern has THE worst
defense in America, or among the worst. (I think they're still
counting the yards UCLA gave up against Arizona...) The Wildcats'
defensive strategy is the old "bend but not break" plan. But even
in their wins, the Wildcats have broken as often as they've bent.
If Ohio State can't move the ball against these guys, they need to
swing on by the morgue. I say the Buckeyes prevail at home, as both
their defense AND offense bends (over) and then breaks
Northwestern. Ohio State by 12.

Indiana at Michigan
I heard the talking heads on ESPN discussing which team should be
considered 2005's "biggest disappointment". The Michigan Wolverines
came in for their share of talk, although they didn't take the
ultimate prize. (Nice work, Tennessee) Well, I'll admit that this
season hasn't been anything to write home about in Ann Arbor, but I
don't see this Saturday's result disappointing the 100,000 plus fans
packed into the big house. Adding another "up" to their "up and
down" year, call this one Meeeeeeeeeeshigan by 14.

N.C. State at Boston College
A loss last weekend by one of these teams put Florida State into the
ACC title game. Unfortunately for FSU, it was BC being upset by
North Carolina that determined the soon-to-be-loser of the first
conference championship game over in Jacksonville. So with the
Atlantic Division race over, BC and NC State gather in Chestnut Hill
to play for nothing beyond pride. Oh yes, pride and Chuck Amato's
job. I think NC State gets it done two weeks in a row. Thank God
for unmotivated opponents, eh Chuckie? Wolfpack by 3.

Maryland at North Carolina
Without a lot of fanfare, John Bunting and his NC Tar Heels have
been sneaking around the old ACC chicken coop this year. And on
more than one occasion, they've stolen some eggs. This Saturday in
Chapel Hill, they'll again try to pinch a win from an unsuspecting
opponent, the Maryland Terrapins. Rotund Ralph and his crew have
missed out on their championship ambitions, but they still have
plenty to play for. Knowing how much Ralph probably likes those
bowl game buffets, I'd suspect he'll have his Terps in fighting
shape come Saturday. Winning a toughie on the road, call this one
for Maryland. Terps by 3.

Connecticut at Pittsburgh
If you want to know the fallacy of the BCS, consider this...going
into last weekend's game(s), either Miami or Virginia Tech, or maybe
both (one can dream, folks...) was already NOT going to get an
AUTOMATIC BCS bowl bid. But, until Pittsburgh succumbed to
Louisville last Saturday night, the Panthers were mathematically
still in the Big East championship, and thereby BCS bid, race.
That's just soooo wrong, folks. Let's let Coach Wannstedt win
another game, though...perhaps this one. Pitt by 4.

Illinois at Purdue
Purdue snapped their losing streak last weekend, right after I
called them the worst team in the Big Ten. But, I forgot about one
thing...namely Illinois. So long as Illinois is in the conference,
nobody else can occupy the cellar. We are, after all, talking about
a team whose highpoint was an overtime win against Rutgers to open
their season. It's been downhill ever since, and I see Ron Zook
continuing the old "Jack fell down and broke his crown" thing on his
trip to West Lafayette. PU by 7.

Florida at South Carolina
I've looked forward to this day from the moment South Carolina hired
Steve Spurrier. As a Florida STATE fan and virulent Steve Spurrier
hater, I knew that having Steve's chickens line up against the
Gators was going to be an emotional gold mine for me. As Oral
Roberts used to say, "something GOOD is going to happen to you". In
my case, EITHER the Gators or Spurrier is going down,
guaranteed. :) OK, who gets to make my day? If this were a
movie, you might could call it "Kickoff in the Garden of Good and
Evil". You see, both UF boss Urban Meyer and USC head demon Steve
Spurrier are considered "offensive geniuses" by football fans. Now,
the jury's still out on whether Urbie's brand of brilliance will be
so smart in the Southeastern Conference. But still, he's got some
ability to coach an offense. But while Steve Spurrier is also
clearly wayyyyy above average in his offensive IQ, he's also an EVIL
genius. And in spite of what we'd all like to believe, good doesn't
always triumph over evil. So, I think Spurrier's new team will find
a way to trip up his old squad this weekend. Meyer's good genius
gives way to the darkness that is Steve Spurrier. Evil over good on
Saturday, call it by 2. (...and besides, Urban Meyer ain't that
GOOD anyway)

Navy at Notre Dame
Isn't Notre Dame's dominance over Navy the longest active win streak
for one team over another? I think the Irish have won their annual
engagement with the Midshipmen for over forty years. The last time
Navy won, Roger Staubach was their QB...and now Roger is one of
those old guys doing "paid endorsements" for burial insurance.
Speaking of insurance, not much in life is guaranteed although in
South Bend, there's two things that aren't changing anytime soon.
First, there's Charlie Weis and his ten-year contract. And second,
there's Navy and their forty-year enslavement. Weis is guaranteed
of at least ten wins at Notre Dame during his tenure, courtesy of
the United States Navy. Notre Dame by 21.

Texas A&M at Oklahoma
Things haven't gone well for either Oklahoma or Texas A&M this
fall. But, the degree of negativity is totally different for the
two schools. Whereas OU has been a disappointment, A&M has crossed
over into "being an embarrassment", at least on some occasions.
This could be one of those occasions, too. Bob Stoopes can't let
his brother Mikey do ALL the ass-kickin' in 2005. (Nice work,
UCLA...) I look for the Sooners to give the boot to Dennis
Frangione's farmers, Oklahoma by 10.

Kentucky at Vanderbilt
I've written Prophet for almost fifteen years. But THIS game is
going to be a historical first, my friends. For the first time
EVER, I'm going to pick Vanderbilt to win a Southeastern Conference
football game...and be right. Commodores win one for the ages,
Vandy by 3.

Memphis at Tennessee
The Tennessee season may be deep in the old crapper, but this is no
time for the Vols to give up. There's still plenty to prove in
2005, and perhaps the most important thing involves the state of
Tennessee. Over the next couple of weeks, UT will have to prove
they're not the third best football team in their own state. Trying
not to become the football equivalent of Al Gore (not winning
Tennessee), Fool Fulmer and his boys take a couple of stumbling but
definitive steps in the right direction. Tennessee moves up to
second best, passing by the Tigers of Memphis. Let's call it Vols
by 7. Bring on Vanderbilt!

Kansas at Texas
Considering the years of sorrow past, beating the crap out of
Nebraska last Saturday must have been a real blast for the KU
faithful. But, sadly the fun began and ended last Saturday. By
showing themselves and their ability to the nation, Kansas has ended
any possibility of slipping into Austin under the Longhorn radar.
Running "Big Red" out of Lawrence had the effect of waving a "big
red" flag in front of Texas. And, we all know that's no way to
behave around a bunch of raging bulls. Call this one a Longhorn
stampede, Texas by 20.

Miami at Wake Forest
This is a dangerous game for Larry Coker's Hurricanes. Oh sure,
Miami will win, I have no doubt of that. BUT...trips to Winston-
Salem are notorious for the ACC's elite teams. The grass is high,
the Deacs are tougher than you'd think. The weather is sometimes
crappy. And traveling to Wake on let-down mode following a huge win
(like last weekend's Hurricane blasting of VaTech) can often lead to
lots and lots of injuries. The `Cane trainers should take extra
tape and ace-bandages. I think it'll be that kind of Carolina
Saturday for the Miami Pound Machine. Hurricanes by an ugly 16.

Arizona State at UCLA
After losing their first game of the year, in spectacular fashion I
might add, Karl Dorrell's Bruins have much to fear in their return
to Los Angeles. Oh, the visiting Sun Devils don't offer any more
than the usual modicum of threat in this picture. The real danger
for UCLA comes from my friend Fred. Fred is a USC alum, and he has
two tickets to the upcoming Trojan-Bruin encounter. Fred was/is
giving thought to selling his tickets. My friend Fred also likes
making money. Put it all together. Can you imagine how much money
UCLA's implosion in Tucson cost Fred? There'd better be Kevlar
vests under those baby-blue jersies. UCLA by 4.

Florida State at Clemson
Just when FSU fans thought things couldn't get any worse, here it
comes...it's Bowden Bowl number whatever, the annual Bowden family
football reunion.
And, it's not just Bobby Bowden's Seminoles playing Tommy Bowden's
Tigers. We'll also get to listen to Terry Bowden's nasal helium-
speak sometime during the broadcast. We'll get to hear more stories
of how tough it is for Anne Bowden (mother of Tommy, wife of Bobby)
to handle this annual clash. Gee, with all of the angst this
millionaire shuffle causes in the Bowden household, I don't know HOW
any of us would dare worry about earthquake, hurricane or tornado
victims. And absolutely worst of all, we'll get to see another
edition of "Jeff Bowden's offense", possibly the most excruciating
sports program on television. Yep, the old Bowden family reunion.
When it comes to good experiences, we've all had gooder ones.
(gooder IS in the Clemson-edition spellchecker, folks...) In all
seriousness, have any of you ever heard of a GOOD family reunion?
This high-noon showdown should be at least a little more fun than
watching your cousins eat Cheerios by a river. Clemson by 3.

USC at California
A friend of mine, knowing how much I adore politics, has been
explaining the recent load of propositions on the California
ballot. Apparently one of the more hotly contested ones is
the "parental notification" initiative, and I'm not talking about
the one involving teenaged girls and abortions. THIS proposition
involves a requirement that parents of football players under the
age of 21 years be notified of their child's intent to play football
against the USC Trojans. That's a life or death issue if I've ever
seen one. But, since most Californians are voting "no" on
everything, look for this "rest of the Pac Ten protection
proposition" to be null and void, thereby allowing SC to legally
murder Cal this Saturday in Berkeley. Trojans by 22.

LSU at Alabama
The Crimson Tide has got to feel a little insulted. THEY are still
undefeated, and yet once-beaten Miami is basically in a dead BCS
heat with the Tide. So little regard for a team that's beaten
Florida and Tennessee!! I think the problem is that Alabama has
little or no offense. They struggled to outscore Tennessee 6-3.
The Vols, on last examination, were ranked something like 110th
nationally in offensive production. Most people, to the outrage of
the Tide faithful, give Alabama little chance to remain undefeated
come bowl time. And while I'm not about to dismiss what Shula has
inexplicably accomplished this year in Tuscaloosa, I am also one of
those folks who doubts Alabama's chances to end the year unscathed.
But, it might surprise all of you to learn that I believe that the
Tide will find a way to flush LSU out of Bryant-Denny Stadium on
Saturday. It will be ugly, it'll be defensive, and some numb-nuts
penalty, fumble, or other error will probably seal the Tigers'
fate. So for this Saturday, Alabama stays unbeaten. THEIR problem
will come on another Saturday with another bunch of Tigers

Auburn at Georgia
This is classic SEC "push comes to shove". Auburn HAS to win this
game to have any chance of making the SEC title game. Georgia HAS
to win this game to stay in the SEC title game. (Unless, of course,
your Prophet is right and South Carolina/Steve Spurrier does the
dirty deed to Florida in Columbia) This would have been a toss-up,
possibly leaning a bit towards the homestanding Bulldogs, IF D. J.
Shockley were healthy. Unfortunately for Mark Richt and crew, we
all saw last weekend how totally average Georgia is on offense with
that Joe Terzy-Ican'tspellhislastname-shinski guy at quarterback.
Scuttlebutt is that Shockley will actually suit up and play against
Auburn. But that bad wheel of his is going to limit his greatest
gift, namely his mobility. D. J. will be running for his life as
the talented Auburn D-line keeps him on a short leash. The Bulldog
fans should say a special prayer FOR their old buddy Steve Spurrier
this weekend, if they know what's best. THAT way, the Bulldogs
might get a second shot at Auburn in the title game, come December.
Auburn by 4.

OK, that's it for this week, folks. Talk to you next week.

91/TIF and ever.