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THE PROPHET SPEAKETH
Fool's Paradise for Internet College Football Fans

© 2005 P.Chamlis/
The Prophet Speaketh, All Rights Reserved

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Games of October 6-8, 2005

Well, I knew it couldn't last. After a terrific slate two weeks
ago, the Prophet had an awful week, thanks in part to such
troublemaker teams as Penn State, Oklahoma and Maryland. Memo to
Coaches Joe Paterno, Bob Stoopes and Ralph Friedgen...you're on my
list, gentlemen. Watch your backs. :)

For the season, Prophet is 83 out of 110 games, which is a paltry
75%. If it were a FCAT score (Florida College Admissions Test), I'd
be repeating the 11th grade.

Let's see if we can show improvement this week...

Thursday, October 6
N.C. State at Georgia Tech
Wolfpack Coach Chuck "Muscles" Amato is starting to feel some heat
in Raleigh. A losing ACC record in the post-Phillip Rivers era,
coupled with two straight losses to rival North Carolina, have the
Pack fans breathing fire. When State heads out to Atlanta Thursday,
it might infer that Chuckles shouldn't come home without a win. If
that's what Amato's been told, I'd suggest he search Hotels.Com for
some extended-stay deals down in the Big Peach. Another
disappointment for NC State, call it Georgia Tech by 7.

Friday, October 7
Syracuse at Connecticut
The new and improved Big East conference is making a big deal out of
the "two new coaches" in their midst. We all know what a huge
impact Dave Wannstedt has had over at Pitt. And last weekend, I got
to see firsthand how things were going for Gregg Robinson at
Syracuse. The short answer is NOT WELL. Syracuse's football team
was about as exciting and threatening, at least from my vantage
point in the nosebleed seats, as a plate of canned peas. If you'd
asked me before the season who'd win a game between UConn and SU, it
would have seemed a no-brainer. The same description holds now, but
let's just say I'm using another side of my brain. UConn by 3.

Saturday, October 8
Marshall at Virginia Tech
When Marshall's Thundering Herd thunders into Blacksburg on
Saturday, they're going to be way out of their league, both from a
conference and competitive standpoint. Come game's end, a nickname
change might be in order for the former MAC-daddies. How
does "Thumped Herd" sound? Tech keeps running for the roses, Hokies
by 21.

Wake Forest at Florida State
OK, even as the most skeptical of FSU fans, I have to admit that
things have gone better than I expected in 2005. Back in August, I
would've bet a week's pay that the Noles would not be undefeated at
this point of their season. That being said, I'm still sanguine and
grounded, much more so than many of my Seminole brethren. Our local
newsrag made some comment today about FSU "sniffing the roses", as
in a visit to Pasadena in January. Well, let's just remember one
important thing...roses are great. But, they can be killed by the
application of too much fertilizer. If FSU can concentrate on
playing football and not slinging "we're great fertilizer" this
weekend, they'll live to be 5-0. Wake Forest is more dangerous than
they are talented. They'll need help to spring an upset, and I
don't think the Seminoles will supply enough overconfidence to
stumble over the Deacs. FSU by 14.

Wisconsin at Northwestern
It's not a matter of if, but rather when. Wisconsin is undefeated,
sitting atop the Big Ten heap. But, we all know the Badger
history. Barry's boys have been in this position before. And
somehow, they always managed to putz the whole show up. Screw the
pooch, so to speak. We all know it's going to happen sooner or
later. This week? Nah...Northwestern will perhaps throw a bit of a
scare Wisconsin's way. But in the end, it'll be another 2005 "W"
for Coach B. Badgers by 6.

Illinois at Indiana
There is nothing more dangerous than attempting to pick a winner in
a football game between losers. You're asking one team to do
something totally unfamiliar. Alien. But when you finally decide
to take the plunge, it's an issue of determining who's the BIGGER
basket case on the field. For this game, that's an easy pick.
Rappin' Ron Zook and his Illini seem to have tossed in the old towel
for this season. I suppose the Champaign Braves can perhaps even
the score(s) come basketball season. And speaking of being losers,
what's with Indiana? Heck, they were undefeated before last
weekend. Kind of rocks my universe trying to think of the Hoosiers
as anything beyond incompetent. Indiana by 10.

West Virginia at Rutgers
Last weekend, Rutgers looked pretty damned good when they played
Pittsburgh. Then again, who doesn't? And also last weekend, West
Virginia looked pretty average as they succumbed to Virginia Tech.
Then again, who doesn't? In a Big East season that, so far, defies
both interest and logic, it's time to restore a bit of status quo.
And for years and years in the Big Least, it's been West Virginia =
winners, Rutgers = losers. Going with the formula, let's call it
Mountaineers by 9.

Mississippi St. at Florida
Last weekend was a lesson for new Gator boss Urban Meyer. Urbie
found out how seriously Florida fans take embarrassing conference
losses. So, I'd suspect that the coach will put that knowledge to
good use Saturday in Gainesville. Winning over Mississippi State
should be a given, but there's one little bit of ugly UF history
that Coach Meyer would be well served to notice. Losing to the
Bulldogs got the last Gator coach canned in the middle of the
season. When's the last time a Mountain West coach got fired IN MID-
SEASON for losing a game, Urbie? Welcome to football in the south,
man. Florida by 19.

Minnesota at Michigan
The Gophers and Wolverines went in opposite conference directions
last weekend. Faced with adversity on the road in East Lansing,
Lloyd Carr's crew found themselves and salvaged their season by
beating (for the umpteenth time) Michigan State. Minnesota, OTOH,
found their way to State College, Pennsylvania, only to lose their
undefeated season, not to mention their confidence. For Saturday, I
see a continuation of recent trends. Look for Michigan to continue
finding their way back into the conference race. And Minnesota??
Let's just say the Gophers will be digging themselves a deeper hole
in this game. Michigan by 7.

Kansas at Kansas State
Well, if nothing else, I made the K-State cadre happy last
Saturday. I have a huge group of Wildcats who read Prophet, and
they LOVE it when I pick their team to win. Now personally, if it
were me, I'd prefer to have me pick AGAINST my team. I have this
real penchant for missing big games. So, be careful what you ask
for KSU fans. This should get me lots of email love... Kansas
STATE by 6.

The Citadel at Mississippi
Rebel fans have been griping at me all season. It seems that I've
failed to pick a single Mississippi game this year. I don't do this
consciously, but perhaps there's an underlying reason. "Ole MISS"
is a good commentary on my history with the Rebels. During my ten-
plus years of writing Prophet, I am way below even picking
Mississippi games. I "MISS" them all the time. But, I'll go ahead
and make a pick here, just to show the old Rebel flag. I saw the
Citadel play football a few weeks ago in person. So, I feel
confident in picking Ole Miss to triumph in this most Confederate of
clashes. (The Rebels against the guys who fired the first shots at
Fort Sumter) Mississippi by 24.

Arizona at USC
Arizona coach Mike Stoopes is best known for his swarming defenses
back at Oklahoma. I'm sure that Mikey was more than pleased to NOT
be associated with what happened to the Sooners in last year's
Orange Bowl. But, Pete Carroll and his Trojan men haven't forgotten
about the "other" Stoopes. Look for USC to give Arizona's Stoopes
brother some of the same brotherly love dished out in last year's
title game. SC by 24.

Texas Tech at Nebraska
How much longer can Nebraska stay undefeated with their pitiful
offensive output? Not much, I'd say. Certainly, the Big Red
players will be out to avenge last season's 70-14 annihilation by
Texas Tech. And, I'd expect things to get nowhere near as "out of
hand" on Saturday. But, there's a reason that the Red Raiders
killed Nebraska last year. And I don't think enough has changed
over the past twelve months to alter the eventual outcome in this
contest. Closer than 2004, but with the same winner, I say Callahan-
Ball comes up short of the mark. Texas Tech by 10.

North Carolina at Louisville
John Bunting's Tar Heels have become unwanted menaces to favored
teams over the last few weeks. There was an upset win over NC
State, and an upset of highly-regarded, but severely over-rated,
Utah. UNC would seem to be the last team any ranked club would want
to face right now. However, nothing could match the chagrin and
embarrassment that Louisville felt two weeks ago, being massacred by
South Florida. So, look for the Heels to hotfoot it out of Papa
John's Stadium Saturday on the losing end of the stick. Cardinals
by 13.

Stanford at Washington State
I've recently become quite close to some Cal Bear fans. And not
surprisingly, they've shared their disdain for all things Stanford
with me. Never mind that a degree from Palo Alto can mean big
things career-wise. Cardinal football just doesn't seem to be on
the high part of the bell curve this year. Didn't Stanford lose to
some high school team a few weeks ago? And no, Cal fans...Stanford
does NOT host the Hoover institute just because they suck like a
cheap vacuum cleaner. :) As for this weekend, Stanford travels up
to play Washington State, a team only slightly better than Marin
Catholic High School. But, that's enough to hang another
embarrassing "L" on Coach Walt Harris' boys. Wazzoo State by 8.

Utah at Colorado State
Last year was sheer magic for the Utah Utes. BCS bowl, undefeated
season, number one pick in the NFL draft. But, what a difference
twelve months makes. The Utes have already tanked twice this year,
both upset losses. And their former wondercoach, Urban Meyer, is
off losing big games in the Southeastern Conference. Is Saturday's
trip to Fort Collins an opportunity to regain the glory of recent
past? Sure it is...for Colorado State, anyway. Rams by 3.

LSU at Vanderbilt
Folks in Nashville got themselves all worked up about Vandy's early-
season success. Had the Commodores been able to win last weekend,
they'd have been 5-0 for the first time since Charlemagne ruled
Europe. However, the combination of hype and mighty Middle
Tennessee put an end to that notion. And on Saturday, let's just
say that 4-1 Vanderbilt is going to be 4-2 in a hurry. LSU may be
tougher to figure than Japanese arithmetic. But, only two quarters
of the "good LSU" team should be more than enough to unplug the
iPods in Music City Saturday night. LSU by 21.

California at UCLA
Saturday night finds the Rose Bowl hosting the Pac Ten battle of the
Bears. The Golden variety (Cal) and the Bruin variety (UCLA) go at
it to determine whose conference season goes into hibernation
first. This game may be closer than we'd have suspected a few weeks
ago, but look for UCLA to be the first bears in bed Saturday. And,
they're dressed the part...those baby blue unis look like pajamas,
right? Cal by 4.

BYU at New Mexico
Time to pick on BYU's fraternity-substitute "clubs" again. This
week's silly sounding BYU club is the "Students Against
Pornography". Now, I'm not saying that being against pornography
is, in any way, wrong. But, I just wonder what set of events leads
to one joining a "Students Against Pornography Club". Does this
mean that any student NOT in the club is in favor of pornography?
Speaking of pornography, the game tape of this contest could be
somewhat distasteful back in Provo. New Mexico does the old nasty
to Bronco's Cougars. Lobos by 5.

Oregon at Arizona State
Call this one the consolation prize. Oregon and ASU, the most
recent victims of USC, hook up in Tempe to decide who might get
second place in the Pac Ten. And, I said MIGHT...Cal and UCLA might
have something to say about positions 2 through 5 as well. Common
wisdom says that Oregon has had more time to recover from their
loss. And, since Oregon was pretty much blown out after halftime,
it wasn't THAT heartbreaking of a setback. OTOH, Arizona State
fought the good fight and had victory in sight. But a sudden
propensity by the Devil receivers to catch footballs and then give
them to the DBs covering them snatched defeat from the jaws of
victory. There's no doubt that Arizona State will be in a funk, for
at least part of this contest. However, I believe the hot desert
climate might be enough to roast the northwestern Ducks before
games' end. Pass the orange glaze, Arizona State by 7.

Ohio State at Penn State
Maybe Penn State IS back. The win over Minnesota last weekend was a
complete thrashing. Could old JoPa finally have things rolling
again in State College? Well, PSU IS better than, say a couple of
years ago. But, they're untested. Ohio State, OTOH, IS
tested...and they failed the test, succumbing at home to Texas. The
Buckeyes know, to a man, that their hopes of something big in 2005
rest with leaving Beaver Stadium winners. This'll come down to
defense, and I see AJ Hawk and company putting the brakes on
anything special that Penn State seems to have found in 2005. In a
battle, call it Ohio State by 6.

Georgia at Tennessee
Have you noticed that Georgia, under Mark Richt, often plays tight
in big games? And, this Saturday's contest is most definitely a big
game, rife with SEC-East connotations. Speaking of tight, Tennessee
is getting to where they play tight in EVERY game, which would seem
to be a detriment. However, when nervous teams collide, I think the
one that's endured and persevered most effectively in other games
has an advantage. Tennessee may have won THIS game two weeks ago
when they climbed out of the crypt down at Baton Rouge. Look for
the Vols' return from the dead to kill Georgia's undefeated slate
for 2005. Tying things into a big mess in the eastern SEC race,
let's call it Tennessee by 3.

Oklahoma at Texas
Oh boy, it's time for the old "Red River Shootout". And for the
first time in years, things look like they'll be very much
different. And, I say that happily, as I was always a Texas
Longhorn fan, due to my childhood time in Texas. But, have things
REALLY changed in UT's favor? Well, the analogy that's bothering me
focuses on Coach Mack Brown. Hmmmmm, Mack BROWN. Same last name
as, ahhhh CHARLIE Brown. Good ol' Chuck. I keep visualizing that
routine where Lucy offers to hold the football while Charlie Brown
does a placekick. Charlie always doubts her integrity, and does his
best to avoid the inevitable. But eventually, Lucy cons good old
Charlie Brown into giving it a try. And, you know the rest. She
pulls the ball away and he falls flat. Let's just say that I think
Bob Stoopes and Lucy Van Pelt are a lot alike. Poor old blockheaded
Charlie Brown. Oklahoma in an upset, Sooners by 2.


See you all next week.

91SIYTIFILYTM