Cybermania: only the best, only in the Nittany Wrestling Federation!

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Dirty Works Report (1/26/01)
by Big Dirty

Hi kids! Do you like violence?

Welcome one, welcome all, to the newest, biggest, and BADDEST NWF column on the web. I am the one they call 'Big Dirty' and I'll be bringing you, the fans, the newly conceived Dirty Works Report with all the news, updates, and dirt circulating throughout the Nittany Wrestling Federation.

Before we get down to business, I would personally like to send out a big THANK YOU to all the hardcore fans who braved the winter elements last weekend to attend our latest wrestling event. For those of you who didn't make it, you missed one hell of a show! Shawn Storm was put on the shelf indefinitely by Fumar Dos (with a little help from Fumar and John Balsamo) after suffering through the most viscious Boston Crab I have ever witnessed. Fumar Dos unmercifully leaned all the way back until his head was on the mat next to Storm's!

In other action, newcomer Bax handed Kevin KanEvil an embarassing defeat after KanEvil screamed pre-match "I'm gonna BEAT you!" Bax was impressive in his debut and could be looking at greater competition in the future.

"Mind and Matter" dominated the Asian Experience, but blew several chances to make an earlier pin by gloating and bickering amongst themselves. These two are very talented, but don't focus enough on the match. This could cost them in their run for the tag titles.

Another newcomer, The Feature Presentation, overcame two talented athletes (The Beater and Fumar Tres), and interference from the reprehensible John Balsamo to win a contract with the Nittany Wrestling Federation.

Finally, in the "Dream Partner Match," Tommy Golden and Fumar were poised to defeat "Rapid Fire" Maldonado when "Too Phat" Yutzak Arafat came from out of nowhere to make the save. However, while Dr. Heresey, Desanto, and an unknown Masked Man stalked the outside of the ring, Referee Tom was distracted allowing Tommy Golden to nearly decapitate Too Phat with a lead pipe handed to him by the Masked Man. This lead to the easy 1-2-3 pin. The question now is: Who was the Masked Man who is ultimately responsible for Too Phat's bludgeoning? How much time will Too Phat need to recover? Will he be back in time to avenge his loss to Tommy Golden, and unmask the Masked Man? Only time will tell...

Also, be sure to log onto the NWF website before FEBRUARY 10th, to register your vote for the Cybermania event. This will be the first ever Pro Wrestling event where YOU the fans will book every single match! Choose your personal "dream matches", and come to the show February 10th, 8PM in the White Building, to see the wrestlers go at it! There's never been a show like this, so be a part of the very first Cybermania!

One last thing! Don't forget to listen to Sahara Sarah's commentary on Monday Night Mayhem at 5PM on Campus Cable Channel 21, and simulcast on the web with RealAudio. She should have all the details on the extent of Too Phat's injury, and may even have some clues as to who the Masked Man was.

Until next time..
The Big Dirty Express