On Sheep, Wolves, and Sheepdogs - Dave Grossman

By LTC (RET) Dave Grossman, author of "On Killing."

Honor never grows old, and honor rejoices the heart of age. It does
so because honor is, finally, about defending those noble and worthy
things that deserve defending, even if it comes at a high cost. In
our time, that may mean social disapproval, public scorn, hardship,
persecution, or as always, even death itself. The question remains:
What is worth defending? What is worth dying for? What is worth
living for? - William J. Bennett - in a lecture to the United States
Naval Academy November 24, 1997

One Vietnam veteran, an old retired colonel, once said this to me:

"Most of the people in our society are sheep. They are kind, gentle,
productive creatures who can only hurt one another by accident." This
is true. Remember, the murder rate is six per 100,000 per year, and
the aggravated assault rate is four per 1,000 per year. What this
means is that the vast majority of Americans are not inclined to hurt
one another. Some estimates say that two million Americans are
victims of violent crimes every year, a tragic, staggering number,
perhaps an all-time record rate of violent crime. But there are
almost 300 million Americans, which means that the odds of being a
victim of violent crime is considerably less than one in a hundred on
any given year. Furthermore, since many violent crimes are committed
by repeat offenders, the actual number of violent citizens is
considerably less than two million.

Thus there is a paradox, and we must grasp both ends of the
situation: We may well be in the most violent times in history, but
violence is still remarkably rare. This is because most citizens are
kind, decent people who are not capable of hurting each other, except
by accident or under extreme provocation. They are sheep.

I mean nothing negative by calling them sheep. To me it is like the
pretty, blue robin's egg. Inside it is soft and gooey but someday it
will grow into something wonderful. But the egg cannot survive
without its hard blue shell. Police officers, soldiers, and other
warriors are like that shell, and someday the civilization they
protect will grow into something wonderful. For now, though, they
need warriors to protect them from the predators.

"Then there are the wolves," the old war veteran said, "and the
wolves feed on the sheep without mercy." Do you believe there are
wolves out there who will feed on the flock without mercy? You better
believe it. There are evil men in this world and they are capable of
evil deeds. The moment you forget that or pretend it is not so, you
become a sheep. There is no safety in denial.

"Then there are sheepdogs," he went on, "and I'm a sheepdog. I live
to protect the flock and confront the wolf."

If you have no capacity for violence then you are a healthy
productive citizen, a sheep. If you have a capacity for violence and
no empathy for your fellow citizens, then you have defined an
aggressive sociopath, a wolf. But what if you have a capacity for
violence, and a deep love for your fellow citizens? What do you have
then? A sheepdog, a warrior, someone who is walking the hero's path.
Someone who can walk into the heart of darkness, into the universal
human phobia, and walk out unscathed

Let me expand on this old soldier's excellent model of the sheep,
wolves, and sheepdogs. We know that the sheep live in denial, that is
what makes them sheep. They do not want to believe that there is evil
in the world. They can accept the fact that fires can happen, which
is why they want fire extinguishers, fire sprinklers, fire alarms and
fire exits throughout their kids' schools.

But many of them are outraged at the idea of putting an armed police
officer in their kid's school. Our children are thousands of times
more likely to be killed or seriously injured by school violence than
fire, but the sheep's only response to the possibility of violence is
denial. The idea of someone coming to kill or harm their child is
just too hard, and so they chose the path of denial.

The sheep generally do not like the sheepdog. He looks a lot like the
wolf. He has fangs and the capacity for violence. The difference,
though, is that the sheepdog must not, cannot and will not ever harm
the sheep. Any sheep dog who intentionally harms the lowliest little
lamb will be punished and removed. The world cannot work any other
way, at least not in a representative democracy or a republic such as
ours.

Still, the sheepdog disturbs the sheep. He is a constant reminder
that there are wolves in the land. They would prefer that he didn't
tell them where to go, or give them traffic tickets, or stand at the
ready in our airports in camouflage fatigues holding an M-16. The
sheep would much rather have the sheepdog cash in his fangs, spray
paint himself white, and go, "Baa."

Until the wolf shows up. Then the entire flock tries desperately to
hide behind one lonely sheepdog.

The students, the victims, at Columbine High School were big, tough
high school students, and under ordinary circumstances they would not
have had the time of day for a police officer. They were not bad
kids; they just had nothing to say to a cop. When the school was
under attack, however, and SWAT teams were clearing the rooms and
hallways, the officers had to physically peel those clinging, sobbing
kids off of them. This is how the little lambs feel about their
sheepdog when the wolf is at the door.

Look at what happened after September 11, 2001 when the wolf pounded
hard on the door. Remember how America, more than ever before, felt
differently about their law enforcement officers and military
personnel? Remember how many times you heard the word hero?

Understand that there is nothing morally superior about being a
sheepdog; it is just what you choose to be. Also understand that a
sheepdog is a funny critter: He is always sniffing around out on the
perimeter, checking the breeze, barking at things that go bump in the
night, and yearning for a righteous battle. That is, the young
sheepdogs yearn for a righteous battle. The old sheepdogs are a
little older and wiser, but they move to the sound of the guns when
needed right along with the young ones.

Here is how the sheep and the sheepdog think differently. The sheep
pretend the wolf will never come, but the sheepdog lives for that
day. After the attacks on September 11, 2001, most of the sheep, that
is, most citizens in America said, "Thank God I wasn't on one of
those planes." The sheepdogs, the warriors, said, "Dear God, I wish I
could have been on one of those planes. Maybe I could have made a
difference." When you are truly transformed into a warrior and have
truly invested yourself into warriorhood, you want to be there. You
want to be able to make a difference.

There is nothing morally superior about the sheepdog, the warrior,
but he does have one real advantage. Only one. And that is that he is
able to survive and thrive in an environment that destroys 98 percent
of the population. There was research conducted a few years ago with
individuals convicted of violent crimes. These cons were in prison
for serious, predatory crimes of violence: assaults, murders and
killing law enforcement officers. The vast majority said that they
specifically targeted victims by body language: slumped walk, passive
behavior and lack of awareness. They chose their victims like big
cats do in Africa, when they select one out of the herd that is least
able to protect itself.

Some people may be destined to be sheep and others might be
genetically primed to be wolves or sheepdogs. But I believe that most
people can choose which one they want to be, and I'm proud to say
that more and more Americans are choosing to become sheepdogs.

Seven months after the attack on September 11, 2001, Todd Beamer was
honored in his hometown of Cranbury, New Jersey. Todd, as you recall,
was the man on Flight 93 over Pennsylvania who called on his cell
phone to alert an operator from United Airlines about the hijacking.
When he learned of the other three passenger planes that had been
used as weapons, Todd dropped his phone and uttered the words, "Let's
roll," which authorities believe was a signal to the other passengers
to confront the terrorist hijackers. In one hour, a transformation
occurred among the passengers - athletes, business people and
parents. -- from sheep to sheepdogs and together they fought the
wolves, ultimately saving an unknown number of lives on the ground.

There is no safety for honest men except by believing all possible
evil of evil men. - Edmund Burke

Here is the point I like to emphasize, especially to the thousands of
police officers and soldiers I speak to each year. In nature the
sheep, real sheep, are born as sheep. Sheepdogs are born that way,
and so are wolves. They didn't have a choice. But you are not a
critter. As a human being, you can be whatever you want to be. It is
a conscious, moral decision.

If you want to be a sheep, then you can be a sheep and that is okay,
but you must understand the price you pay. When the wolf comes, you
and your loved ones are going to die if there is not a sheepdog there
to protect you. If you want to be a wolf, you can be one, but the
sheepdogs are going to hunt you down and you will never have rest,
safety, trust or love. But if you want to be a sheepdog and walk the
warrior's path, then you must make a conscious and moral decision
every day to dedicate, equip and prepare yourself to thrive in that
toxic, corrosive moment when the wolf comes knocking at the door.

For example, many officers carry their weapons in church. They are
well concealed in ankle holsters, shoulder holsters or inside-the-
belt holsters tucked into the small of their backs. Anytime you go to
some form of religious service, there is a very good chance that a
police officer in your congregation is carrying. You will never know
if there is such an individual in your place of worship, until the
wolf appears to massacre you and your loved ones.

I was training a group of police officers in Texas, and during the
break, one officer asked his friend if he carried his weapon in
church. The other cop replied, "I will never be caught without my gun
in church." I asked why he felt so strongly about this, and he told
me about a cop he knew who was at a church massacre in Ft. Worth,
Texas in 1999. In that incident, a mentally deranged individual came
into the church and opened fire, gunning down fourteen people. He
said that officer believed he could have saved every life that day if
he had been carrying his gun. His own son was shot, and all he could
do was throw himself on the boy's body and wait to die. That cop
looked me in the eye and said, "Do you have any idea how hard it
would be to live with yourself after that?"

Some individuals would be horrified if they knew this police officer
was carrying a weapon in church. They might call him paranoid and
would probably scorn him. Yet these same individuals would be enraged
and would call for "heads to roll" if they found out that the airbags
in their cars were defective, or that the fire extinguisher and fire
sprinklers in their kids' school did not work. They can accept the
fact that fires and traffic accidents can happen and that there must
be safeguards against them.

Their only response to the wolf, though, is denial, and all too often
their response to the sheepdog is scorn and disdain. But the sheepdog
quietly asks himself, "Do you have and idea how hard it would be to
live with yourself if your loved ones attacked and killed, and you
had to stand there helplessly because you were unprepared for that
day?"

It is denial that turns people into sheep. Sheep are psychologically
destroyed by combat because their only defense is denial, which is
counterproductive and destructive, resulting in fear, helplessness
and horror when the wolf shows up.

Denial kills you twice. It kills you once, at your moment of truth
when you are not physically prepared: you didn't bring your gun, you
didn't train. Your only defense was wishful thinking. Hope is not a
strategy. Denial kills you a second time because even if you do
physically survive, you are psychologically shattered by your fear
helplessness and horror at your moment of truth.

Gavin de Becker puts it like this in Fear Less, his superb post-9/11
book, which should be required reading for anyone trying to come to
terms with our current world situation: "...denial can be seductive,
but it has an insidious side effect. For all the peace of mind
deniers think they get by saying it isn't so, the fall they take when
faced with new violence is all the more unsettling."

Denial is a save-now-pay-later scheme, a contract written entirely in
small print, for in the long run, the denying person knows the truth
on some level.

And so the warrior must strive to confront denial in all aspects of
his life, and prepare himself for the day when evil comes. If you are
warrior who is legally authorized to carry a weapon and you step
outside without that weapon, then you become a sheep, pretending that
the bad man will not come today. No one can be "on" 24/7, for a
lifetime. Everyone needs down time. But if you are authorized to
carry a weapon, and you walk outside without it, just take a deep
breath, and say this to yourself...

"Baa."

This business of being a sheep or a sheep dog is not a yes-no
dichotomy. It is not an all-or-nothing, either-or choice. It is a
matter of degrees, a continuum. On one end is an abject, head-in-the-
sand-sheep and on the other end is the ultimate warrior. Few people
exist completely on one end or the other. Most of us live somewhere
in between. Since 9-11 almost everyone in America took a step up that
continuum, away from denial. The sheep took a few steps toward
accepting and appreciating their warriors, and the warriors started
taking their job more seriously. The degree to which you move up that
continuum, away from sheephood and denial, is the degree to which you
and your loved ones will survive, physically and psychologically at
your moment of truth.