The corkball season is shaping up. Bobby should
be coming up from Huntington sometime in april. He
might bring up a St. Louisan who works with him at the
Irvine R.B. Meanwhile, we need to figure out how we're
going to organize our games when more than 8 players
show up at the same time. In my experience, the 7
player game is the best--the extra phitter playing DH.
For the special series, like that of the Fools Day
Classic, we can move to the 3-out format, or we can try
the option we've talked about in the past: two games
on two fields. The only problem with that solution
would be lack of equipment. Elsewhere, both Louis and
Vic are devising teams, which in the end will
probably best be organized willy-nilly when the players
show up on the field.

Chris Bennett and Mark Behrens will be out here
for the weekend of May 5 and 6. These would be the
best pitcher and hitter, respectively, from the old
St. Louis days (this even includes the brothers; some
of them hit more homers than Bare-Ass but none were
a tougher out; if you're pitching badly he kongs
all the mistakes; if you're pitching well he does
this Ty Cobb choke up the bat thing and chops singles
kind of like Haskett but way more effective (German
efficiency?).

Unfortunately, Bobby is not going to make it for the April Fools Day Classic. 
What a pity!  He will try to come up to the Bay Area either the following
weekend or the weekend of the fifteenth.

Yes, Shari's fine, and she's a better hitter than most of the guys.  Not a lot
of power but a lot of accuracy and coordination.  I'd love to see her face off
against you.

Yeah Bobby got the call in Irvine. I'm sure he's
going to try starting a league there. Hey Vic! Maybe
you should give Minsky's phone number to Bobby. So
you have hard hitting women shaking their asses as
they hit your balls?!!! Sounds kinky. Maybe if I make
it to St. Louis this spring I can catch a game.

Bobby's in Orange County now!!!??!!! Yikes!!?!!
That's B1 Bob's turf ... creepy Crystal Cathedral ...
knuckle-dragging, Ayn Rand acolytes ... No Doubt and the Offspring
... the place where Ronald "Mommy Can You Change My
Diapers" Reagan kicked off both of his presidential
campaigns.<br><br>We're going to be starting a new corkball season here
soon too. The snow has almost completely melted, but
that means it's still wet and muddy. Anyway, I'll keep
you posted. I've sold a lot of guys here on the value
of corkball -- oh and girls too. Yes, boys, we have
fine-ass girls playing in our league, shaking their
booties and smacking them balls!

It was a heckuva game....and a heckuva day.
Scooter and Nate both made their pitching and hitting
debuts this season. Hopefully, with the new schedule,
more players will come out regularly. It even looks
that we might get some support from the Grasssos.
Nighttime yielded much drinking--and for
he-who-Will-not-be-named, half-drinking. Anyway, a beer drinking score was
tallied on the washing machine at the end of Saturday
night's damage--the final result being 7 half-drunk
Sierra's and 3 half-drunk Heinekins (who could drink a
whole one?)....and you wonder why E. was pissed off?

Two short preseason workout games happened
Saturday between 12 and 2 p.m, when we yielded the field
to the Grassos. Play is improving: pitchers threw
strikes, batters made contact, there was good catching and
fielding and the short length of games meant no one is
overworking their arms. All in all, a good day.Next weekend
should be a week off, as John goes to visit Bobby in
Orange County, but we may have a last tune-up on Sunday,
March 25, and certainly will kick off the season in
style, appropriately, on April Fools Day. Bobby will be
the only out-of-region guest.

There will be another pre-season game this
Saturday at Cambrian Park. Hopefully, the grassso tot
season hasn't begun yet. Possible players showing up:
Viktor; Louis the Rake; Clowny Jack; Lefty McCabe;
Scooter Bayer; Chente; T-Bone B.

This one's for you Vic; I gave Vince the nickname
'Chente'. Apparently, chente is a diminutive of Vincente. I
heard it used when I was living in Mexico. The famous
ranchera singer Vincente Fernandez, he of the ham'n'cheese
variety, always drew the cheer, "Chente! Chente!"

(In high pitched Neal Young squawk): They took
the tarps off the field! They took the goddamn
tarps!! <br><br>Seriously, they didn't take the tarps,
but they did remove them from the mound and home
plate. On my way to work, I stopped by the field to
check the grounds work the Grassso's did last Sunday.
the field looks great, but the tarps were moved,
probably to let the sod dry, and folded in a corner.
Unfortunately, the small red bricks were missing. Obviously,
someone has rioting on their mind. Good call Vic. At
least the cinder blocks were there. I imagine the
huffies would have a harder time flinging one of
those--even in one of their solvent-induced stupors. Ah, who
would've thought corkball would have to battle such gnomic
enemies!

The name and artifact (towering stack of burning
tires) would make a great conceptual art piece
though.... Wait! Do I smell another killdozer rip-off tune
in the works? John: You've yet to hear my killdozer
tribute "Uncle Don's Sweet Revenge", which I wrote
especially for Vic to sing.

OK - so it isn't really called "the eternal flame
of Cesar Chavez" - I just made that up, and not all
of it is discarded automobile tires, some of it just
plain old trash. Apparently this neighborhood is just
outside of the city's refuse collection area and they
burn their trash once a week in this vacant lot. I
found this place when I got lost on the way home from
Hilary's old place. Before I stopped talking to my former
friend Laura, she explained what the deal with (or I
should say without) trash collection was in certain
neighborhoods in east Austin. Austin is a really nice little
city - its just growing too fast. The ghetto/barrio
here is diminutive and tame by comparison to most
other places I've resided. Just thought I should
clarify.<br><br>-Cole-

The weather here in TX is sunny, with highs in
the seventies and lows in the upper forties at night.
This is almost ideal corkball weather. Unfortunately
at the moment I have a broken leg, so I won't be
throwing too much any time soon. <br><br>Markwort still
hasn't gotten back to me about the complimentary copies
of the official corkball rulebook I requested (they
are only a dime apiece through the Markwort catalog,
but you have to be one of their client stores to
order anything from the catalog). I still don't have a
bat and there aren't any places in central TX which
carry corkball equipment. I may have to special order
it through Softball Supply, located in the heart of
the not-so-scenic southeast Austin barrio, home of
petrochemical pollution and "the eternal flame of Cesar Chavez"
- a perpetually burning inferno of automobile tires
way far east on Cesar Chavez Boulevard. "Adventures
in urban living".

We have almost enough members to keep from
getting e-leted at the end of March. Just one more and we
got it!! Thanks to all of our new members (the
brothers Brinkwirth). We finally have a little posting and
participation!! The more the merrier (and other inane cliches).
Let the other folks ya mentioned know about the club
or give me some e-mail addresses and I'll send them
polite invites. <br><br>I'm thinking of starting either
a sunday eve chat or reviving our old (and sparsely
attended) thursday eve chat. Whaddya think? <br><br>Bennett
- stop being anti-social and f*cking join already!
I need your permission to slightly edit your
corkball piece - it won't quite fit in the space allocated
for messages.<br><br>Thanks everyone... keep throwing
and we'll keep growing!

Vince is known as Chente? Explain, por favorCITO.
Weather over here has been warm and muggy, over 60
degrees but with no sun and (except for patches of thick
fog in the redwoods and out at sea) altogether warm
and humid, not unlike Spring in St. Louis. It
definitely had that Spring in St.Louis sky and climate
except for mountains and fog and ocean). Corkball
weather. Let's see if any of the non-Californians show up
for our season.

We always get the microclimate just a little bit
ahead. I thought "hey, what's that big bright yellow
thing up in the sky?" " a big, bright, fried egg at
Uncle Bill's? the Hummingbird? Eat Rite? The Bluebird?
The Cardinal Lounge? Zachary's with Mike Donnegan? "
What, a real celestial event (not an artery clogger)?
Sun, yes. It's been weeks. Late sunset over West Cliff
with a full moon coming up in the East. Pink skies,
green hills, sunset at about 6:15. Daylight Savings
starts on April 1. Corkball season approaches. Beer,
sun, mota, big home runs, barbecue at the Brinckwirths
on balmy Summer nights (having a balmy night-
something that never happens on this side of the hill).
Can't wait. Everybody post more. Those of you in St.
Louis or LA or Orange County, CA or Chicago or
Columbus, OH: fucking post, already. Aaiiight? Nu?
Dialogue, baby. A riot is a terrible thing and I think we
need one right now!!!! There was only one Christian
and he died on the cross!!!!! Let me be one
long-winded, extremely emphatic, famous-quotin' cliche (and
shit). Bye.

I woke up this morning and felt the sun's warmth on my flannel jacket.  Clear
skies ruled.  Ah, today would be a shweeet day to play corkball, eh Vic? 
Shweeeeet!

Hopefully, if weather permits, there'll be
another outing this coming weekend. The players who
showed up last time, the will, Louis the Rake, Clowny
Jack, Kid Haskett, and Chente all performed well.
There's more players out there who'll be previewed and
showcased here in all their glory. John--do you know when
you'll be flying out? Lemme know when you get a chance.

Now that Spring Training has started, I encourage
those rambunctious West Coasters and all others to post
their pre-season, regular season and post-season
schedules on the calendar. I'd like to coordinate chats
after these events. I'd also like to request that
someone take pictures of play and submit them to me for
potential inclusion as our Club Photo. Any and all
baseball, corkball or ritual stoning photos can go in
either the Group folder or a personal folder of each
member's creation in the Photos section. <br><br>How to
turn a regular photo into a digitized image suitable
to post:<br><br>Scan the photograph into a computer.
This usually saves these as GIFs or PIFs, which,
although postable, take a really long time to download or
upload. If you then transfer these files to a media
player, you can convert them into MPs, which have greater
definition and upload and download much faster. After this,
either e-mail me the photos or post them straight to the
Group Photos folder. <br><br>p.s. - techno djs and
guacamole are not how one traditionally celebrates Mardi
Gras! :)<br><br>Keep throwing and growing! I may see
you crazies in the last week of April, but who
knows...<br><br><br>John "Coleridge"

Spring Training for the Players League began
auspiciously during the Mardi Gras festivities at the
Brinckwirth vortex. In spite of several veterans and rookies
receiving services from local groupies the night before
reporting to camp, the players did not exhibit any signs of
slothfulness or unwillingness to sport robustfully.

I think I'm going to have to cancel the thursday night chats. I just hate
sitting here throwing curve balls at the wall waiting for someone to show.

Hey, guys,<br><br>Don't just visit occaisionally
- freakin' JOIN!! It benefits both of us. You get
to use the Club's facilities to post messages, email
others with the same interests, post schedules of
upcoming events, post news, play-by-play, summaries and
editorials in the News, participate in the chats (which
haven't been happening because nobody has been showing
up), post photos and MPEGs and link other related
sites via the listed links. Markwort isn't taking me
seriously because I only have two listed members - I want
equipment at the wholesale price, dammit!<br><br>-John-

We need your corkball photos! Leagues are
actively encouraged to start their own group photo albums
in our Photo folder. Movies would be even better!
<br><br>Keep throwin', keep growin'...<br><br><br>John

John, Louis, Bobby... drop me a line. If you could drop me the names of some
folks to invite I'd really appreciate it. Just heard about your Dad,... my
condolences.

If you know anyone who might be interested in
this site or this club, please feel free to send them
an invite (Under Member tools). Until we actually
get our official Sports listing in the Yahoo clubs
index, that's the only way we're gonna grow.

Markwort is the world's largest supplier and
manufacturer of corkball supplies and equipment. I just had
them send me a catalog, a new copy of the Official
Corkball Rule Book, and I'm trying to get an account with
them (bats at the wholesale rate - sweet!). Their web
address is: www.Markwort.com

Feel free to post league schedules and any upcoming corkball events, no matter
how small or remote, on the Calendar. <br><br>Thanks!

This club is for anyone and everyone with an
interest in or passion for corkball. I encourage those
curious persons ('Corkball? What the hell is corkball?')
to join and participate. All you have to do to join
is to click on that little bar at the top right of
the screen. Once you've joined you can make use of
the Message Board, post photos in the album, or use
the chat feature to "talk" with others who share your
interest all over the world. I'm currently interested in
photos of folks playing the game or MPEGs of "league"
play (post under 'Photos'). To my friends in
California or anyone else who so desires - please feel free
to post your league news, stats and scores on the
Message Board. We got a good thing goin', lets keep the
ball rollin'! <br><br>Thanks for your interest! Good
games!<br><br><br>John "Coleridge"

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