If I sent this previously I apologize.





Are you tired of those "friendship" poems that always sound good, but
never actually come close to reality?


Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of the stone cold
truth of our great friendship.*


1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against
the sorry bastard, or bitch, who made you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you stories about how much worse it
could be... until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again.
I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

9. This is my oath. I pledge it to the end, because you are my friend.

Send this to ten of your friends, then get depressed because you can only
think of four.

And always remember, when life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt.