You might be addicted to NASCAR if...




If you wake up in the morning to a alarm clock that says "Gentlemen
Start your engines" with a motor sound behind it. (I have one-don't
use it though)


If you refer to going to the bathroom as a "Pit Stop". (Morgan does
too)


Men, While going to the bathroom you swirl it in a left hand circle.


If you have a number painted on the side of your car/truck. (truck
did)


If you put a yellow stripe on the back of your teenagers car.


If you have a conversation with any "normal" person an no matter what
number they say you can name the driver.


If you only drive down one way streets so you can make a tight left
turn.


If you time your self at the gas station against another person
filling up your tank.


If you consider your Sunday Best to be a racing suit.


If you are in the store and "bang" another shopper with a cart so
they don't pass.(depends on the day)


If you log on to chat on the internet and your handle is anything
like Wub2Race or LooseIntheCorner. (kylesbiggestfan2003)


If you buy 4 new tires when you have only one flat.


If you have ever told a ex-girl/boy friend they didn't "Qualify".


If you are 1st at a stop light in traffic an you look around and
think you're sittin on the pole.


If you tape the races and watch it more than one time after that.


If you are at a race and know what the lingo is on the scanners.


If you name your baby after any driver and use Dale as the middle
name. (Kyle Richard Bolton was on the list)


If you know all of the states and towns names of where the tracks
are. (most)


If you pass somebody by while walking an in your mind think "lapped
him".


If you can remember the date of Daytona at the start of each season
but not your wives/hubby birthday. (remember the ex's but not the
family members anymore)


If you tell yer children they have been black flagged when they get
in trouble.


If you can name the year and track of regular drivers 1st wins and
not remember your wedding anniversary. (i rememebr both actually)


If you have gone to a auto parts store and asked for the window tear
off film.


If the doors on your car/truck work fine and you still crawl in and
out of the window.


If you go to Walmart once a week with your spending money and buy
NASCAR ©™ related stuff.


If you save your extra money for tickets to a race instead of a
vacation every year.


If you have the NASCAR.com or RacinPortal.com website as your home
page on the computer. (mine is pettyracing.com, gp.com, nascar.com)


You run out of gas and try to explain to the cop (who's giving you a
sobriety test) your weaving from lane to lane was just and attempt to
get fuel into the pickup.


When you have an accident, the first thing you try to do is pull off
the steering wheel. The next thing you do is blame Robby Gordon.


You're sitting behind someone at a red light, and when it changes,
you yell, "GREEN! GREEN! GREEN! GO! GO! GO!"


You time yourself on your wrist watch when you pull into the self
serve gas n go.


On an interstate exit ramp you stay on the outside to keep the RPM's
up.


You make sure to stay under 55 when you leave the gas pumps.


You say "But officer, I wasn't tailgating, I was drafting"


You consider slower cars in the left lane as "lapped traffic"


Before traffic begins to resume regular speed on the highway, you
find yourself weaving side to side warming up the tires to optimal
tempature.


You can't wait for next year to see what Soap powder your favorite
driver has as a sponsor because the one he's got now keeps giving you
a rash.


You drive for 2 hours out to the nearest Valvoline Quik Lube.


While explaining to the officer why your car is smashed into the
interstate ramps guardrail, you explain: Well, the First National
Bank/ Smith Family Chevy was running great today. That blue Ford got
in behind me, loosened me up , I drifted high and the next I knew, I
was in the wall, but......I don't blame the other driver, heck, what
can I say....that's racing!!


You have ever actually yelled "YOU KISS MY A**" out the window of
your car when you see a car with a 24 sticker in the window.


You've ever pushed little kids to the ground at Toy-R-Us to get to
the Racing Champions cars first.


You rearrange your diecasts to match the grid during cautions.


You have a mini winners circle for your dicasts.


You get caught stealing the lifesize cut out of your favoritie driver
from the local convience store. (if i could find a kyle i would)


You refer to the family mini van as the "team hauler"


You hit the car in front of you, and tell the officer "Rubbin is
Racin!"


You've ever seriously considered putting an "onboard camera" in your
car.


You plan family vacations around race dates.


When you pass someone on the highway you refer to it as taking them
on the inside.


You take your 4yr old son with you because you need a spotter.


You sign up for flu shots (at work) on Fridays so you can fake sick
in order to get home in time for qualifying.


After riding behind the same two dumdums riding side by side for
SOOOOooooo long, you decide to make it three wide down the front
stretch, and pass them in the emergency lane ( after looking, of
course)


Your buddy is passing someone on the interstate, you're in the
passanger seat yelling, "CAR HIGH!!!....CLEAR!!!"


You can get 12cans of beer, 4quarts Gatorade, and 8 sandwiches into a
14" cooler and NOT squash anything.


You think nothing of getting up at 4am, driving for 5 hours, sitting
in a traffic backup for 3 hours, baking in the sun, spending 5 hours
to get out of the parking lot, driving 5 hours home, getting up the
next morning at 5am, going to work on 3 hours sleep, and telling
everybody what a GREAT time you had!



http://profiles.yahoo.com/kylesbiggestfan2003 (check it - i just
changed the photo today - the old picture was from the charity ride)