Dear Ventura Hash,

As former RA I would like to send you a song that is more than appropriate for your drunken St. Patty's Day/Eve/MornAfter pub crawl, and it goes like this:

(In Melody of an Irish Jig)

Hmmmmmmmm

Welllllllllllllllllllllllll

Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzmichael,

Especially when Patrick's wife's having her cycle,

But, both of their wives will surely agree,

That a two-headed dildo is better than thee!

...now drink one down for me, and have a kick-ass St Paddy's Day!

wHeed wHack Her