Have a good laugh, everyone!
Prosti: Agay! ... aguy!... Arayyyy!...,
Wa ka katunong dili na maong buho-a,lubot ma na!
Bol-anon: AaAah! puslan man mag bajad...magbuho kog lain!!!!
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Dying Man: I wish i could Kiss the Afghanistan Flag before i die
Nurse: i have a tattoo of it in my butt.
Man kisses it and said "Lady please turn around so i can also kiss bin laden."
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WIFE: wa kay ayo, TAMAD! biyaan ta ka! 
HUSBAND: suwayi! , pag imo buhaton, maglaslas ko! 
WIFE: butbot! hadlok gani ka patuli, maglaslas pa! PISOT! 
Masahistang Bisaya: Unsa man ang gusto nimo, Sir, . . SOP o MODIRIT?
Customer: Ano ba 'yung SOFT at MODERATE mo, day?
Masahistang Bisaya: SOPsopin ko pa ba o gusto MODIRITso na? 
Master scolding his Boholano maid: YOU IDIOT!
The maid answered: Ajawg banha sir, unja ra inig lakaw ni Mam,kita mag IJOT!!
Inday Ai Ai : noy! noy! pila ma kani inyo pitaka? 
Tindero: 900 day! 
Inday Ai Ai : ngano mahal man.. sa pikas 300 lang 
Tindero : panit sa otin man gi-gamit ani day .. sige nimo hikap hikap .. modako mahimog maleta. 
Si inday Ai-Ai nag pa check up sa doktor..
Doktor : day, ga basa ang imo ha kay gi sip-on,ato ni tambalan.. ako sa butangan akong otin ug Vicks.
(doktor insert his penis,start pumping.. in out in out)
Inday Ai-Ai: matay dok! .. wa palang ni vicks iyot naman ni...
MaNag-Uyab:
BF: luv, lami kaayo imong boobs! patutuya ko be.
GF: ulaw man ko. 
BF: sige na!
GF: lisud, ga bra ko!
BF: Ayyy.... 
GF: gusto ka tila na lang, wa man ko panty
GAbii ba, kita ko duha ka tiki sa kisame. ingon...
LAKI : mag-ana ta
BAYE: di pwede!
LAKI: ngano man?
BAYE: buang ka? 
mohayang ko unya mopatong ka, matagak ta!
Patient:
Doc depressed kaayo ko , ako asawa mi larga sa states, unsa may tambal ani?
Doctor: TIRAMID 500 
Patient: Unsa mana?
Doctor: Tirahi imong maid bayarig 500
Girl: doc, naa ko problema. ako uyab taas kaayo ug oten, bun-og kanunay akong atay
Doctor: Sayon ra na, atong putlan
Girl: Ayaw doc! isibog lang ang akong atay.
During Science class sa school...
Teacher : Class use euthanasia in a sentence 
Jose : Mam si maria dili na virgin kay naeuthan na sia.
Anak: Nay, taga-e ko piso bi.
Nanay: unsaon man nimo!
Anak: palit ko tambal padako sa akong oten.
Nanay: diay dos pesos, apili imo tatay
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